Oh, Albie.
I wrote a while back about how Albert was beginning to explore death and dying and love. He's still there, dealing with some 6 year old fears, and deepening into love and connection. Last night, as we were going to bed, the deep river of love started overflowing. "Mama," he said, "I love you so so so much, I love you so much more than you love me." I explained that I didn't think that was possible, that a mama's love is bigger than the universe, but no... he assured me that his love was infinity. Mine was only 100 googol. As we turned off the light, and kissed papa goodnight, he got weepy with his love again. In his most emotional voice he said, "I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful mama, and I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful papa." I snuggled up and held him tight and told him that he was a gift, a precious gift in my life, and that I too was filled with gratitude. He replied, still with that weepy (he could win an oscar) voice, "I know. I am a gift." And then he began to name all the people in whose lives he was a gift: "I am a gift to Abu, I am a gift to grandma and grandpa, I am a gift to Patti..."
He is always a character, no matter how precious the moment.
In this, the last year of his first cycle of seven, he is unfolding. Really. I feel as though I am witnessing the unfolding of consciousness, of connection, of vision. There is sadness -- the innocence of babyhood is being left behind, or perhaps transforming into something different -- but the boyhood that is arriving, well, my heart swells. I am seeing him more and more as a companion on the path -- this sense of: I know, I'm human too, there's so much, life is so big... (Doesn't mean I don't nag him to eat his breakfast, this growing companionship status...)
There is something going on, and I am honored to be a witness to this child's growth, and I am honored that we can share the path for a while.
I love reading your blog! Miss you!
Posted by: kasia | April 22, 2009 at 04:56 PM